Oxford Friends Meeting
State of the Meeting Report 2010

Our Meeting continues to be concerned about our shrinking size. Some members and attenders have pulled back their involvement with the Meeting. We do not seem to be attracting new attenders and appear to lack incentives for young people to attend. Financial support has decreased and there are fewer people to take responsibilities for managing our three properties.

We have a consistent core group of Friends who come together in search of spirit and meaning in our lives. As a group we comfortably focus on the business at hand. We are flexible and have been willing to take risks and try new things. Having the Head Start Program leave after sharing our space with them for eight years has been a significant transition for our meeting this year. It has felt good to have our kitchen back for our own use. This fall, members cleaned the kitchen extensively in preparation for a member’s memorial. This process did something for us in reclaiming the space and connecting with one another. Preparing meals and eating together has always been a positive experience. We have a lot of strength and resilience when we work together. When there is work to be done we show up and do it joyfully. All this supports both our corporate spirit and our sense of community.

In the past year, we have done better at allowing disagreements to surface. Tolerance has been a great tradition in our Meeting but things could fester. We are becoming better at bringing up matters that have brought tension and are taking steps to resolve concerns rather than drawing back or avoiding conflict. There is more effort to listen to each other and to come to some resolution. There is a concern that we have lacked balance in our devotion of time towards spiritual development versus property maintenance demands. We seem to have more anxiety when focusing on the spiritual aspects of worship . Although members experience refreshment and support in the sphere of silence created in our corporate worship, there are also expressed desires for more vocal ministry.

As a Meeting and as individuals, we seem to be in contemplation of transitions of significant proportions. We are a small scattered group. Coming together to accomplish things has taken great effort at times. Although our smallness causes us to worry, it has also provided many opportunities for us to grow in unexpected ways as we share and appreciate members’ gifts.

Specific activities this past year:

1. We changed the time that Meeting starts and ends.
2. A professional sign was designed and erected for the Meeting yard.
3. The Book Group continues to meet monthly.
4. Members continue to serve as Board Members and staff at George Fox Friends School.
5. Meeting Members continue to receive support from community volunteers in stewardship of our properties at Little Elk and the Brick. The iron fence at Little Elk was repaired and painted.
6. Even though the Christmas candlelight service required a last minute change of date and place, we saw a good turn-out of those who had not attended for awhile as well as attendance from the Quarter.
7. We saw increased participation within our Quarterly Meeting. We mapped the burial ground at Little Elk during the spring Meeting.
8. Our historic Meeting houses have been open more frequently for both Meeting for worship and outreach to the community.
9. We are pursuing legal work to bring our Charter into compliance with Commonwealth of PA laws.
10. The Revised Queries proposed by the Faith and Practice Revision Committee of BYM were worshipfully considered during Adult First Day .
11. Mariah Bradley presented Quaker Quest at our Meeting during Quarterly Meeting with discussion of fellowship opportunities.
12. A member of our Meeting attended FWCC in Oregon for the Section of Americas Annual Meeting.
13. Maintenance: a large tree was removed. We have several dedicated Friends who care for the grounds and gardens.
14. Fellowship: summer picnic, Crop Walk with potluck dinner afterward at the Meeting, gingerbread houses made with younger members.
15. We provided support to George Fox Friends School by offering our property for concerts and yard sale with Alex’s Lemonade Stand.
16. Losses: Albert Jon Magoon died October 7th and a Memorial was held at the Meetinghouse November 7th. Tom Ryan, Sojourner , retired to State College, PA.

Our Meeting has seen worship become more silent over time -- not uncommon for small Meetings with falling attendance. Some Friends rejoice in the depth of the gathered silence; some are challenged to center in the absence of vocal ministry; and some experience both from time to time. Our individual busy-ness complicates our desire to nurture the Meeting Community.

As an experiment this past summer, we shortened the expected time for worship to 45 minutes and shifted the starting time from 11:00 AM to 10:30. At the rise of Meeting we gather in a circle to share a particular joy or moment of meaning from the past week. We are carrying these changes into the fall, when we also plan to resume monthly adult discussions before worship.

This summer, our tradition of opening the Brick Meetinghouse in Calvert Maryland on the first Sunday of the month attracted a number of curious neighbors and passers-by. This created pleasant opportunities for sharing histories, laughing and worshiping together. The sessions proved so successful that we shifted to opening twice a month and prompted one Friend to suggest that perhaps we should move back to this architectural gem with its multi-holed outhouse.

Nottingham Monthly Meeting continues to have many concerns related to our sense of size and feelings of loss. Our small size has resulted in an increased focus on maintanence issues, which may be detracting from more spiritually growthful opportunities. However, we recognize our need to find the energy to address our practical matters, nurture our spiritual growth, and take steps to ensure our vitality. We have a strong sense of community and have created a spiritually safe and open environment where members are able to share their spiritual journeys together.

Our Adult Religious Education Class has been focusing monthly on the new draft queries from BYM. We read a query and then engage in worship sharing. We then take time to process our reflections and consider suggestions so that we might provide written feedback to the Faith and Practice Revision Committee. Participants report finding the process spiritually enriching through the insights received about our faith and each other, and hope that BYM will find our responses helpful to their process.

Our historic meeting houses continue to be used for seasonal worship. We were informed that one of the very large white oaks on the Brick Meeting House property is a State of Maryland champion tree for both it's age and size. We were given a certificate and letter thanking us for our stewardship. Our Christmas sing at the Brick was very well attended by meeting members and visitors from the surrounding community. Little Elk continues to benefit from the care of interested area residents with family connections to the burial grounds. We also continue to provide tenant support for the local Head Start Program, and the George Fox Friends School has been growing as demand for infant and daycare has increased.

Our relationships with other meetings within our Quarter have revitalized over the past year. We reinstituted a spring meeting to devote special attention to burial grounds within the Quarter. Through the experience of several workshops, we also jointly learned about Quaker Quest, a community outreach program sponsored by FGC. Those who enjoy worshiping and socializing in a larger group experience have enjoyed the energy present in our Quarterly meetings. Members of Nottingham Monthly Meeting have joined with other members of the Quarter to form a core group so that plans for Quaker Quest can move forward. We share the hope that through outreach and increasing the communities' awareness of our presence and offerings, our spiritual communities will grow. However, there is both excitement and trepidation about what we might have to risk in order to realize growth.

A number of us have been devoting an hour before worship once each month to consider the draft queries circulated by the Faith and Practice Revision Committee. In part, this is a response to the Committee’s request (2008 Advance Reports): “…we strongly urge each Meeting to gather in small groups, or as a whole for small meetings, to reflect and discuss the Advices, Queries, and Voices.” But, our prime motivation is the richness of the sharing – the insights we receive about our own faith and about one another -- prompted by the drafts (there are now 16 in all).

One faithful Friend passes out slips with the new queries (taken from BYM’s web site) and checks that we remain comfortable with the suggested worship sharing format. Each of us speaks (usually) once from the silence. Our convener reminds us as the time is dwindling to allow any who have not shared to speak. We try to allow ten to 15 minutes at the end of our hour to reflect on the process and consider suggestions or feedback for the Committee. At the end of our hour, our convener passes out copies of the Advices for us to consider individually over the week ahead. Reading the Advices at the start, we feel, would risk predetermining or restricting the direction of our reflections. A few days later, our convener circulates notes on our session that she sends on to the Committee for consideration when it returns to the revision process.

The draft queries used in this way succeed in leading us to deep reflection and understanding. Hence, while we earlier concluded that we prefer the 1968 text as guiding queries and remain confused about the charge under which Faith and Practice Revision Committee is operating (session Minutes and Manual of Procedure are unclear), we appreciate the value of the drafts that have emerged from the reflections and discernment of this group. For example, the proposed query on outreach led some of us to reflect on how we came to Friends, which in itself told us something about the types of outreach that work. Varying the focal word in each part of the queries on integrity -- “truth,” “beliefs and values,” “harmony” – enriched and expanded our sharing.

And, our sharing has prompted suggestions. For example, small Meetings might benefit from considering, under the heading of vocal ministry, “How do we as a Meeting create fertile soil for vocal ministry, especially from those who find it difficult to speak?”

Nottingham Monthly Meeting continues to reflect a small but vital spiritual community as we worship and work together. We enjoy the fellowship of our shared tasks and find meaning in our journeys together.

Our Adult Religious Education Class has been focusing on the topic of forgiveness as a spiritual practice for the past year. A group has met monthly to read a variety of materials on forgiveness, including excerpts from D. Patrick Miller's " Little Book of Forgiveness". The readings, discussion, and worship have created a safe place where members shared personal experiences and reported benefits.

We had a threshing session in the fall where we directly engaged meeting concerns. The grief and mourning of accumulated losses was present as we confronted our sense of size, sometimes feeling a loss of depth and weight. We were saddened again when a new and active Meeting attender died suddenly in October. The Meeting decided to invite Lamar Matthew, BYM Clerk of Ministry and Outreach, to meet with us. He reassured us that our experience is not uncommon and commented on our apparent vitality.

Many of our members are very active with the larger Quaker community, some holding Committee positions within BYM. One member represented BYM at Friends World Committee Consultation Triennial. A traveling minute was provided for a member studying in Nepal.

Our historic meeting houses continue to be used for seasonal worship and to be involved within their respective communities. Little Elk Meeting house has become a popular stop on Elk Township's Historical Association Tour and a portion of the property located at the Brick has the interest of the local school board. Responsible stewardship of these Meeting houses and burial grounds continues to require diligence and planning.

George Fox Friends School which is under our care, was successfully reorganized and is adding new children. We continue to provide tenant support for the local Head Start program.

We have begun focusing on peace and social concerns for one meeting for worship a month. Some members of the Meeting also participated in a local Peace Vigil. We continue to participate in the Crop Walk.

The monthly book group remains active, but the Women's Worship Share group was laid down this year. Members continue to gather for occasional pot luck meals and a summer picnic. A full workday was very well attended by a multi-generational group. Many outdoor tasks were accomplished and the group shared lunch and fellowship on the front porch afterward. We continue to value and enjoy our relationships with other meetings in the Quarter and have planned a work day at Balance Meeting in the spring.

We are working well together to fulfill our practical responsibilities. We are also increasing our confidence in more fully recognizing and sharing our unique spiritual gifts.

We are grateful for the monthly reminders in Faith and Practice and the communications from others that turn us to discerning anew our commitment to Friends’ worship and witness to the world. In 2001, York Monthly Meeting asked us to reexamine our sense of unity with Friends’ historic peace testimony. At 2007 annual session, Yearly Meeting Peace and Social Concerns Committee, believing that “our commitment to peace and justice must go beyond words and minutes,” asked us prayerfully to consider a number of actions “many of which are already being done by BYM Friends” and to report back with a description of our activities in response.

Nottingham Monthly Meeting (which gathers each First Day in Oxford, Pennsylvania) laid down its Peace and Social Concerns Committee several years ago because the committee rarely met and some of those who agreed to serve did so out of a sense of obligation rather than having discerned a leading to pursue this work through the Meeting. At the time, we agreed to devote a portion of our Meeting for Worship with a Concern for Business to consider how we as individuals and as a Meeting are led to witness for peace and social justice.

This focused time was a welcome respite from the busy-ness that too easily can creep into “meeting for business.” We shared reflections that many of us are committed peace makers and advocates for social justice in our individual vocations or through individual leadings. We used this time to respond to suggestions for specific corporate actions. However, over time we found that this part of the agenda was being squeezed or eliminated by the press of other business and by the need to honor the time set aside for open worship each First Day.

In considering how we might respond to the request from Yearly Meeting Peace and Social Concerns Committee, we agreed to dedicate one First Day each month (starting in November) to centering our worship around peace and social justice concerns. A member (Gail Pietrzyk) chooses a reading for us to consider once we have settled.

In November, Gail read an article originally published in Quaker Life on the “Quaker Peace Testimony,” available at http://www.quaker.org.uk/

For December, Gail turned to the Nobel Foundation, which maintains an archive of information for every Nobel Prize since 1901. She read excerpts from the 2004 article “The Humanitarian Nobel Peace Prizes,” http://nobelprize.org/nobel_prizes/peace/articles/stenersen/ focusing particularly on the activities of the British Friends Service Council and the American Friends Service Committee and the historic commitment of Friends to social justice and humanitarian relief as essential steps in taking away the “occasion of all wars.”

This pattern continues into the new year. In discerning how to respond to peace and social justice concerns, we seek to wait expectantly on the leadings of the Inner Light, uncontaminated by guilt, self-satisfaction, or external yardsticks.

Nottingham Meeting remains small but continues to have a strong sense of community and unity. In our Adult Religious Education we began our year with Anita Bower sharing her spiritual journey. We then spent several months listening to and discussing the Joseph Campbell series on Myths. More recently we have studied the Baltimore Yearly Meeting Proposed Revised Queries. This has led to discussions of early Quaker practices and history. It has also created a safe place for worship sharing and exploration of our diverse beliefs and experiences. The book group and women's worship share continue to meet monthly. George Fox Friends School continues to grow with various members of the meeting supporting the school as staff and volunteers.

Nottingham Lots. Tercentenary Celebration 2001 was published in March It is available for purchase through the Internet.

We still have the challenges of the perpetuity responsibilities of two older Meeting Houses and burial grounds under our care but we have found them to also bring joy and a connection to the wider community. Little Elk and Brick Meeting Houses are opened for worship during the summer months and we held our annual Christmas carol candlelight service again this year at the Brick. Increased interest of area residents with family connections to the Little Elk Meetinghouse and burial ground has led to critical improvements and repairs. They have righted gravemarkers, rebuilt the stone gate posts and are undertaking a number of other projects that otherwise would have been beyond the Meeting's capabilities.

The multipurpose use of our meetinghouse has presented some challenges as we experience some conflict with a tenant over conservation values and communication. We have resolved to maintain our focus on the benefits to the children served by this program as we labor to clarify and resolve any differences.

We felt sorrow over the tragic death of Tom Fox. We held Wednesday night vigil until the hostages were released.

A witch hazel and a sugar maple and a variety of bulbs were planted in memory of Gene Galantino throughout the year.

We have been very saddened by the loss of several Meeting members and long-time attenders this year. Their lives have enriched us and their talents and contributions will be missed. We are being led to more fully recognize the need to find balance between practical responsibilities and our needs for spiritual nurture and community.

It is not unusual for a Meeting to have several historic meetinghouses under its care. Upkeep can seem burdensome at times. Recently, one of our meetinghouses – Little Elk – attracted the attention of neighbors and others with family connections to the Indulged Monthly Meeting that once worshiped there. They have righted leaning tombstones, rebuilt the stone gateposts, and undertaken a number of other projects that otherwise would have been beyond our capabilities. Best of all, they have joined us for worship and fellowship when we open the meetinghouse once each summer month.

Our sense of community continues to deepen. We remain small with a rather static membership, but we are always delighted when new people come to Meeting.

Several older members live in retirement communities and nursing homes nearby and some of these members have not been able to attend Meeting regularly because of health problems. Individual members have taken it upon themselves to personally visit and support members of this group, developing meaningful relationships and helping them attend Meeting programs when they are able.

Members spontaneously take responsibility for particular needs of the Meeting when they feel able to specifically contribute. Our clerk continues to keep us focused and grounded in the spiritual experience during our Business Meetings. Our recording clerk keeps us organized and informed through e-mail and through regular mail for those who need it. She also creates weekly flower arrangement center pieces which enrich our Meeting for Worship. Our Treasurer continues to manage our financial and investment records and responsibilities with care. She also helped organize and edit a publication of the Tercentenary Celebration of Brick Meeting and the Nottingham Lots. It is to be published the beginning of 2006. A member of our Property Committee has taken care of many specific problems that have happened to our Meetinghouse and grounds with the stress and strain of being used daily by Head Start as well as our Meeting Programs. He addressed our need for an emergency sewer line repair in a timely and skillful manner so Head Start did not lose too many days of operation in the Meetinghouse. He also worked out a recorded Plot Plan for memorial plantings on Meeting property for our present and future reference.

We began our monthly potluck lunches upstairs in our library because several members were no longer able to safely use our stairway to the basement. This time has given us a special feeling of closeness as we talk and share while sitting family style around the library table.

On Easter Sunday we held a special Meeting for Worship to celebrate the lives of five month old twins, Kate and Owen Eriksson, and welcome them into the Meeting. Their parents, Ruth and Torkel Eriksson, were married in the Meeting in 1997 and Ruth has been a member of Oxford Meeting since childhood. Her parents also are members of the Meeting. Torkel is Swedish and his parents came from Sweden to be with us for this special celebration. Kate and Owen Eriksson were accepted as members at the official request to the Meeting by their parents.

"We lost a dear Friend, Edith Kaufman, who died at the age of ninety-five this year. She had transferred her membership to the New Garden Monthly Meeting, the Meeting of her childhood, after her health made the trip to us from the Kennett Friends Home too difficult. We treasure memories of her flower arrangements and her horticulture improvements to our Meeting grounds as well as her historical interest in Brick Meeting.

The Sewing Committee was laid down with the death of Ethel Coates and the health problems of Margaret Cashel. These two Friends made many quilts over the years for the American Friends Service Committee. The remaining material and money was given to the West Grove Friends Meeting Sewing Group. The Oxford Meeting Women's Worship Sharing Group has begun meeting monthly at Margaret Cashel's apartment in her assisted living unit since she has not felt able to attend Meeting.

This summer Miriam Reisler presented her Spiritual Journey among Oxford Friends to us at the Little Elk Meetinghouse. She had many pictures to share which took us back several generations with many memories. Throughout Miriam's life, Oxford Friends and the Little Elk Meeting have been an important part of her life and she has offered much of herself to these Meetings.

Many Oxford members were involved in helping the Nottingham Quarter sponsor the Baltimore Yearly Interim Meeting at Eastland and Penn Hill Meetings helping serve the meals. George Fox Friends School celebrated their Tenth Anniversary for founding the school this year. They now have 58 children; 38 children are in the elementary school and 20 children are in the early learning center. Several members of our Meeting play key roles in managing and supporting the school.

Several times a year Friends Folk Club uses our Meetinghouse for their evening concerts. We had the third Threshing Session in October to see how we felt we were doing as a Meeting and the response was very positive. Our adult First Day School was active this year. Part of the year we studied the historical roots of the queries and considered the proposed revised queries of the Baltimore Yearly Meeting. We then spent time listening to a series of audio tapes by Joseph Campbell on the Power of Myth.

In December, a member initiated a weekly vigil each Wednesday night at our Meeting, holding the four Christian Peacemaker hostages in Iraq in the Light. For the third time we ended the year for Christmas caroling at the Brick by candlelight and woodstove. A musical family of our Meeting lead us in song with guitar and violins.

A suggestion for forum or adult religious education periods: Have members share reflections and memories about their spiritual journey. Two such sessions over the past year in our Meeting have been revealing and drawn us all closer.

Considering the Faith and Practice Committee’s draft Queries and Advices created a wonderful opportunity this spring for us to learn about the history of Queries within the Religious Society of Friends and the role they play and should play today.

We feel gratitude to those in the Meeting who meet the sometimes unexpected demands of our gracefully aging Meetinghouse and anticipate future needs. Tree roots invading our sewer line illustrated the former last spring; re-glazing the windows is a longer term example of the latter.

Nottingham and Little Britain look forward to seeing many of you at Interim Meeting in October.

We began our year under the guidance of our new Clerk who felt led to attend a clerking workshop at Pendle Hill. As a result, our Business Meetings are more Spiritual and focused.

In February, our dear Friend, Gene Galantino died and again our Meeting experienced a sense of grief which brought forward the losses of the previous year. Gene's openness in sharing his spiritual journey through his terminal illness was a gift to us, helping us heal and enabling us to offer support to his wife, Ruth Galantino..

With the arrival of Spring, we had a second Threshing Session focusing on what we would like to see change or improve in the next six months. Through this process some of us were led to take on jobs for the Meeting that were new to us or we had not felt able to do before. Our Meetings for worship tend to have more vocal ministry and a deepening of worship.

Adult First Day School had a series of worship sharing sessions on the personal experiences with the Bible. Individual members shared favorite verses or meaningful uses of the Bible. At the invitation of Ministry and Counsel, Mary Louise Maule gave a special presentation to the Meeting sharing her Spiritual Journey. It was very well received and we hope others will feel led to share their journeys. Our children and teenage population has become very small so it is the hope of Ministry and Counsel that this kind of sharing to the whole Meeting will be especially enriching to the few children present.

Special groups have formed outside of Meeting such as a book group, woman's sharing group, and a knitting group which has provided opportunities to strengthen the community. Our Meeting was blessed with the birth of twins on November 1' to Ruth and Torkel Eriksson. We plan to welcome them in the Meeting with a special celebration in the near future.

George Fox Friends School continues to grow and various members of the Meeting are involved in supporting the school as staff, volunteers and as student. Head Start continues to use our Meetinghouse for their program and this year it has gone very smoothly for us.

Even though our community remains small, we have developed a spiritual closeness and a real feeling of confidence that we will be able to creatively address problems as they arise.

Care of three meetinghouses is daunting and our small community struggles for balance in drawing on members' gifts. No one felt burdened as we sang carols, felt the woodstove's warmth, and enjoyed cider and cookies in the 300-year-old East Nottingham meetinghouse.

As we gathered for a threshing session, aware of our dwindling number of active friends, we took stock of our present position. First we searched deep in a really rewarding threshing session where we wrote down our personal concerns and our sense of the direction of the Meeting. These were compiled for more insight. We had spent the past year with a different clerk each month which we found as a good experience and a growing awareness of the business meeting as a real experience. Out of the threshing session, a clerk for 2004 stepped forward to take the position. A deep silence of renewal covered us all at that point in the session and we felt renewed.

As fewer active members can devote to meeting needs, the nominating committee combined committees. Ministry and Counsel has met and is reviewing past memberships and is sending notes to as many as can be contacted to let them know of our holding them in the Light and offering them some procedures if they are interested.

Head Start has been with us since September and has taken on several projects with our physical plant to keep in compliance, some we finance but mostly they have undertaken the big things at this point. We have had a sense of cooperation and when we need the basement and kitchen, we let them know and they give us the space we need. Their monthly fee was decided on that we will not profit from their presence but we have kept it open for review as we study past expenses and will readjust accordingly.

Spiritual State of the Meeting Report - 2003

The Year began with a realization that two valuable members of our Meeting would be retiring and moving out of the area. This left us with a sense of impending loss and a feeling of being overwhelmed by the responsibilities we would now have to undertake.

One of the first things we had to resolve was finding a new clerk and when no one person was willing to step forward, the Nominating Committee condensed committees and came up with a plan of rotating "clerk of the month". This turned out to be a very good exercise for the whole Meeting as everyone became more aware of all of the responsibilities which clerking entails.

As we prepared to honor our long-term members who were moving, we were faced with an unexpected death of a beloved member which intensified our feelings of grief and loss. We then put a lot of energy and support into nurturing this young family.

Shortly thereafter, we were approached by Head Start to use our facility to assist underprivileged children for the fall. The details of this commitment brought us to a realization that the Meetinghouse needed much work with limited resources both in funds and people to handle the tasks.

We had not had time to recover from the recent losses and were overwhelmed by the decision-making and responsibilities. This brought us to a decision to have a Threshing Meeting where we considered the health of the Meeting and the possible changes our smaller size might suggest. From that meeting, we have again connected with a spiritual bond which led us back to the real reasons we want to be part of the Meeting. It has renewed our hope for the future, our love of each other and strength to abide. And from that session, someone was led to offer to be clerk of the Meeting. We are drawing together under the Spirit and individual members are working together to meet the obligations and responsibilities of running the Meeting.