The program for Chesapeake Quarterly Meeting on September 9, 2007 was focused on "Young Quaker Lights" – how our Meetings nurture our youths. The following queries were considered:

• How do children and youth fit into Friends Meetings?
• What activities do our Meetings provide for our youth outside First Day School?
• How do we integrate our young people into the full life of the Meeting?
• How do we prepare young Friends to move out into the world as Friends and become part of the larger Quaker community?

Representatives of four meetings of the Quarter spoke about how their Meetings are responding to these queries. The representatives were:

• Mike Ratliffe from Sandy Spring
• Kevin-Douglas Olive from Homewood
• Mardy Burgess from Annapolis
• Roger Reynolds, John Buck, Sara Lunden, Ellie Girbach, Sophie Reynolds from Patapsco
• Other people from these Meetings who were not on the panel added ideas, as well.

Mike Ratliffe reported that Sandy Spring has a very large group of young people. They have hired two people (part-time) to assist with the program. They have a curriculum for the various age groups and they have many activities like the Christmas program, the Halloween party, and other events. One issue they have to deal with is that attendance of young people is uneven and they wonder why – is it due to the parents’ schedules; is it due to the space limitations; is it the curriculum; or other? One challenge the Meeting had this past year is that the young Friends decided to stop their involvement in the book sale which they indicated didn’t interest them. Young Friends want time and space to get to know each other. They want to do activities and sometimes need assistance with structure and planning. Another issue Sandy Spring is dealing with is thinking about how to spiritually nurture the teachers of First Day School. The Meeting is giving a book to each of the young people as a kind of rite of passage, just as they give a Bible to each of the third graders. Overall, Sandy Spring feels enriched by the large group of young people who are part of the Meeting.

Kevin-Douglas Olive reported for Homewood Meeting. He said the Meeting has lots of babies, but not many school-age kids. One thing they have tried is to have all-group activities for the children like art or yoga or dance. This kind of activity can appeal and be of interest to a large age range. They have tried having the children in Meeting for the whole period, but some parents have resisted this idea. They are exploring “Godly play,” and are finding this meaningful. Homewood does have an active young adult group which is from 18 to 35. This group was initiated by Kevin and his late partner when they decided to try to particularly welcome anyone in that age group and to make connections with them to encourage them to attend regularly. The group grew and met regularly to consider queries and to share and eat together. There have been some challenges in terms of the Meeting wanting more oversight of the group than the group thought it needed. Recently, the group is focusing on the question, “Why are we here?” and are thinking about why they have chosen to come to Quaker Meeting. They have found this to be a very helpful approach. They are challenged by how to have parents within the young adult age group participate in the group and have appropriate child care as well.

Mardy Burgess represented the Annapolis Meeting on the panel. She reported that they have nursery kids, elementary, junior high and high school kids. They meet with the adults for 15 minutes, then leave for their program, and then return for Joys and Sorrows and announcements, and Meeting guests. Among other topics, the young people have considered such issues as drugs, sex and what it means to be Quakers. They want to talk about sexuality and spirituality and they wonder if a sexuality/ spirituality course may be needed. They have had activities such as game night, movie night, overnights, and an extensive Christmas program which the young people worked on for a month. They do involve kids on committees, including Religious Education Committee. Another project they have been involved in is partnering with a third grade class in Philadelphia – gathering supplies needed by that class, and then meeting the teacher and the students.

The Meeting feels a need for “rite of passage” activities for teens. If positive activities are not provided, then kids often choose negative rites such as losing their virginity or getting drunk. The Meeting is seeking other types of passage activities. They try to stay in touch with their college kids and to check back with them when they return.

Sara, Ellie, Sophie, Roger and John reported for Patapsco Meeting. The middle and high school kids at Patapsco have been offered clearness committees. The young person chooses three adults for his/her clearness committee, the clearness committee talks with the parent(s) first about the young person, and then they meet with the young person for one/two times to talk with the young person about his/her interests, future plans, and needs from the Meeting. In one case, for example, the committee found that the young person had an interest in baking and asked him to bake for one of the simple meals. The Meeting is now trying to support the young people in joining the Meeting’s committees. The teens held a Meeting for Business for a time, but that has petered out lately. A number of activities have been held outside Meeting, such as a camping trip, trips to visit other churches, and hiking and swimming gatherings. The older kids have been involved in teaching some of the younger ones in First Day School. The middle school kids had a semester in which they wrote their own queries. Their queries include questions like, “What should I do if I see someone cheating in school?” or “What should I do if I am picked on?

After the panel concluded, others in the group shared questions/concerns and thoughts. Friends were then asked to talk in twos and threes for a few minutes about how we can, in the future, integrate our younger and older people in our Meetings and then some of these ideas were shared.

Ideas for the Future:

• There was a desire to try to link young people from the various Monthly Meetings in the Quarter together for some activities. People indicated that for such joint activities, they need more notice than they have sometimes gotten.
• Since not all kids like long overnight regional meetings, it was suggested that shorter regional gatherings might be held, such as on a Saturday afternoon.
• Meetings could be more noticing of guests and be consistent in their continuing welcome of those guests/young people.
• New adults to the Meeting can be asked to help research topics for First Day School. In this way, they can be helping serve the First Day School and they can be learning about Quakers, as well.
• Meeting clerks or RE clerks could send announcements about their youth activities to other Meeting clerks via email and could include events from other Meetings in their own announcements on Sundays.
• We need to remind ourselves that “problems” belong to all of us – they are not just young people’s problems to solve.
• We should think about what message we are giving when we ask the young people to leave Meeting after 15 minutes. When does the Meeting really begin?
• Young people could hold videotaped interviews with older Friends or could ask adults to be in a debate such as Inner Light versus the Bible and then could video tape the debate. These two examples are given as examples of activities that young people could initiate and could then ask the adults to participate in.
• Mentors could be chosen for young persons in the Meeting – or could be chosen by young persons in the Meeting.
• Hold a Meeting for Learning – adults and kids together.
• Have trimesters for First Day School, rather than semesters, thus allowing for more switching so that First Day School teachers would not have to miss Meeting for so long a time.
• Ask young people to return for the end of Meeting and bring with them a question for all the adults to respond to.

The discussion seemed very energizing for all and we left with renewed interest in involving people of all ages in the life of the Meeting.

Ramona Buck