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SPIRITUAL STATE OF THE MEETING REPORT - 2004

Adelphi Friends Meeting remains a strong and vital place where many come to worship, engage in "Adelphian" activities, enjoy the sense of community, and get energized for their own personal spiritual journey as well as their work in the wider world. We are a large and diverse Meeting, with a wide span of ages from infants to elders, enriched by those new to Quakerism and those with long experiences of it.

Yet we struggle with how to integrate newcomers into our Meeting life and how to help them on their spiritual journey. We value the personal relationships we've formed at Adelphi, but our large size and large number of newcomers makes creating new relationships and maintaining old ones a serious challenge. We also see the need to reaffirm our responsibility as Quakers to teach and pastor one to another. We seek to improve the quality of the silent worship and vocal ministry in Meeting for Worship - a special challenge in this very politically engaged year. We continue to struggle to be tender with each other in Meeting for Worship for the Conduct of Business. We also find it difficult to balance the desire for more Meeting activities in the wider world with our need for more depth as we nurture our spiritual life and our Meeting community. While these are perennial challenges at Adelphi, we continue to make efforts to address them.

The Ministry and Worship committee drafted this report based on questionnaires filled out by members and attenders, as well as by committees; discussion at a second hour; and input from Junior Meeting and Young Friends. Meeting for Worship for the Conduct of Business also provided input. We recognize that not everyone in Meeting contributed to this report, but Ministry and Worship feels it reflects the general sense of the Spiritual State of the Meeting. Takoma Park Preparative Meeting prepares its own Spiritual State of the Meeting report.

Meeting for Worship remains the center of the spiritual life of Adelphi Friends Meeting. While many found the worship and the vocal ministry deeply moving, concern was also expressed about the many messages that did not seem "spirit-led." In addition, joys and concerns seemed to many to be too lengthy and without enough time between messages. We recognize that the hotly contested presidential election in 2004, the war in Iraq, the revelations of torture, and polarized and deep concerns about our country and the world, made it difficult to center our worship in the living Spirit. Many were uncomfortable with the assumption by some speakers that all others agreed with the speaker. Some messages expressed righteous indignation without deeper spiritual examination. Upon reflection, we needed another venue in which these opinions could be expressed. Concerns were raised that we have been unwelcoming to Christ-centered Friends, the military, and political conservatives. Some stopped attending Meeting for Worship because of these issues. While Ministry and Worship began to address these concerns during the year, this made us ask ourselves, do we embrace everyone who comes through our door and do we respect the nature of Meeting for Worship?

On a lighter note, we heard much appreciation for the babies and their noises in Meeting. Far from disturbing us, they remind us of the continuity of life and the need to nurture the next generation.

Meeting for Worship for the Conduct of Business has been a way for Friends to support Adelphi and to work in the wider world. Many were uplifted by the actions of Business Meeting, especially by the Minute on Iraq, which was signed by 55 Meetings and worship groups and published in two Arabic newspapers and is attached. Others expressed surprise at how untender Friends could be on this and other matters. We heard concerns that the work of committees is often not respected in Business Meeting. Common Quaker practice reminds us that Business Meeting is a Meeting for Worship, not a discussion; that vocal ministry is not personal, it is from that of God within us; that we rise and address the Clerk, not the presenter; and that the Clerk may need to call for a period of silence if emotions run ahead of discernment of God's leading.

We discovered again that Quaker process is deliberative and takes time. Trying to shorten it may lead to problems. For example, this year at Business Meeting a minute was approved that many felt passionately about, but someone who had not been present did not approve of it. While Meeting was trying to move ahead quickly, some felt that this issue was not given sufficient seasoning. We learned that the communication process within the Meeting was inadequate. We also recognize the need to explore the time-honored role of dissent within the Quaker community.

Wednesday night Meeting was laid down, due to poor attendance, but occasionally re-instituted; for example, when the torture situation in Iraq became known and for a post-election Wednesday night Meeting. The issue of the personnel policy of Friends United Meeting (FUM) and Adelphi's relationship with FUM was of great concern this year. Early Meeting on Sunday remains small, but also well appreciated by those who attend who find its small size and mostly quiet worship a blessing.

Both Junior Meeting and Young Friends felt nurtured by Adelphi. Junior Meeting found that their Meeting with its candles and clay to work with suited them better than "big" Meeting. While they like coming to Meeting because of what happens there, they especially liked doing things such as planning for and carrying out Games Day, and similar activities that raise money to share with others in need. They enjoyed helping with potluck, Strawberry Festival, and other community events.

Junior Meeting members expressed great affection for the old playground. They understood that safety problems required that it be dismantled, but they were upset that it was taken down without prior warning and were upset to arrive at Meeting to find it gone. They indicated they would have liked to be consulted about the new playground, as they have many ideas of what they would have liked.

Young Friends enjoy the community and think "Quakers are cool people." One tension with "big" Meeting is that while they like "hanging out" with their friends, they feel that many adults at Adelphi don't know who the Young Friends are. While they would like to see more people in Meeting pitch in when there's hard work to be done, and more trips such as canoeing and rock climbing, they also found that Young Friends provided a welcoming community and comforting routine. Pomegranates were desired as snacks.

Adelphi's committees are where most of the "work" of the Meeting takes place and where Friends get to know each other in greater depth by working for common purposes. Although much was accomplished, committee work was especially stressful this year. A few examples: Finance Committee experienced much anguish when we made our budget in just the last few weeks of the year, but nevertheless instituted several new ways to improve the whole budgeting process; Nominating Committee had great difficulty finding people to serve on committees; and Adult Religious Education Committee was down to two members, but began to re-imagine itself and was re-invigorated toward the end of the year with a much appreciated "Introduction to Quakerism" series. Fellowship, in general, seemed down this year; even both Catoctin weekends were less well attended, although this decline continues a trend from previous years. What does this mean for stewardship and the quality of our community life?

Strawberry Festival, our annual community event to raise money, marked its 50th year in 2004 and was another successful opportunity to work together as a community. Adelphi's week to host Safe Haven, a countywide effort by local churches to help the homeless, was rescheduled from its more usual December time to February of 2005. The tutoring work at Mother Jones Elementary School continued growing. The series of Second Hours on death and dying was excellent and much appreciated by those who are beginning to understand that they have to "plan on dying." Adult Religious Education started a well-received series on Introduction to Quakerism, but more ways are needed for us to help each other learn about Quakerism, worship, committee service, outreach, etc. An increasing number of us are going to Yearly Meeting and serving on its committees.

Friends Community School (FCS) continues under the spiritual care of Adelphi Monthly Meeting, with strong ties between the two communities. Tensions remain, however, between those who support FCS and those who support public schools.

While the year did seem to be more of a challenge than some previous years, Adelphi began to acknowledge these issues quickly (for Quakers) and worked to address them during the year. Ministry and Worship heard many members and attenders express gratitude to Meeting for being there for them during this difficult political year, a year in which it was especially difficult to be a Quaker in the world and not get discouraged. We find that Adelphi Friends Meeting nourishes our spiritual needs, fosters our participation in community activities, and supports our efforts to "see what love can do" in the wider world.


Interchange, Summer 2005

Our Introduction to Quakerism series continues to be very popular, drawing between 30 and 40 people per session. Holding it on First Day shortly after Meeting for Worship appears to be a main contributor to its success. The Adult Religious Education Committee has worked very hard to draw in our many new attenders.

Saturday Meeting for Worship is now being held monthly on the land in Greenbelt where the new Friends Community School is to be built.

A Quaker Earthcare Witness interest group is being formed at Adelphi and will be holding its first Second Hour in May.

Deaths: Barry Costilo, February 19, 2005


Interchange, Spring 2005

Adelphi is evaluating why our camping weekends at Camp Catoctin (May and September) have not been well attended recently, and deciding whether to lay down or re-invigorate these weekends that once drew many .

Friends Community School will break ground for its new building in Greenbelt in July 2005. Construction hopefully will take a year.

Safe Haven, a moveable shelter for homeless men, will take place at Adelphi for a week at the end of February. Many folks from the Meeting pitch in. The men sleep on cots in the Meeting House and leave after breakfast for their jobs, returning just before dinner.

Our Meeting House seems to be bursting at the seams some First Day mornings! Some times it is difficult to find a seat until the children leave for First Day School. Newcomers continue to check us out and ask about Quakerism. We are blessed with this enthusiasm, although we struggle to find ways to integrate newcomers into our Meeting and not leave them lost in the crowd.

Our most recent Clerk, Pam Tyng, is retiring. Pam and Art are moving to Williamsburg, Virginia and will be missed.


 

Interchange, Dec 2004

A letter to the people of Iraq, a Ministry of Reconciliation initiated at Adelphi Friends Meeting, has now been signed by 55 Friends Meetings. The letter will soon be published a second time in Al Hyat, a newspaper in Iraq. This will likely finish the work on this particular effort.


We have turned our efforts to fundraising as the end of the fiscal year is in sight and we are behind in donations. Finance Committee hosted a Pancake Breakfast after Meeting on October 31. The breakfast was well attended and a wonderful community builder. In addition, Finance Committee has undertaken coordinating a holiday SERRV (now "A Greater Gift") sale that will not only raise money for craftspeople around the world but will donate a percentage of sales to our Meeting.


Takoma Park Preparative Meeting reports that their new location in Takoma Park has been working out well. A plus is that it is wheelchair accessible. Since moving to this location, attendance has settled in at an average of 12-per-First Day.


There is excitement about Friends Community School's plans for their new school building in Greenbelt. Architectural plans have been drawn up for a "green" building, using the straw bale construction method. In addition, the school has received a three for one matching grant for contributions received between October 1 and March 1, to a total grant of $1.8 million. A first Meeting for Worship on the new land in Greenbelt is scheduled for November 20.


On December 11, the Religious Education Committee will host an annual holiday gathering for individuals and families, featuring refreshments and activities such as making ornaments and baking cookies.



 

FUM Policy Concern

Dear Friends:

We are writing to provide input about Baltimore Yearly Meeting's response to concerns with Friends United Meeting's (FUM) employment practices for paid and volunteer positions which discriminate against gay, lesbian and non-celibate Friends. More specifically, we are addressing the question of what to do with the undesignated line item of $17,400 which was previously designated to FUM.

As to the employment practices, there was unity that the FUM policy is in conflict with the Quaker testimony of Equality. Attached is Adelphi Meeting's Minute, dated November, 1991, which speaks to Adelphi's support for lesbian and gay relationships. While we recognize that it goes beyond the current question of FUM's employment practices, we hope it may assist you in coming to unity.

As to the question of how to spend the money, we did not come to unity. There was concern that withholding of funds might not help resolve the issue and would divide Quakerism at a time when we need to be united on so many important issues particularly related to our Peace Testimony. At the same time, it was felt by many that it is wrong to financially support practices which violate Quaker testimonies. There was strong support for spending the funds in a way that would promote healing and many of those present supported using the funds for inter-visitation between Baltimore Yearly Meeting, monthly meetings within FUM and FUM itself. It was felt that this would do the most to promote healing and support the process of resolving the issue within FUM and BYM and between the two organizations. Another suggestion was to give FUM the funds with the understanding that they would be spent in a way that did not support FUM's employment practices. This would give FUM the responsibility for resolving the dilemma while still supporting their programs.

The following statement from one meeting member speaks to the issue of healing, which was strongly felt by many present:

"Speaking our truth about FUM's incorrect policy concerning sexually active heterosexual people and gay people is essential to our Quakerism, but not only because we support the equal rights of those excluded from leadership. The policy also prevents FUM Friends from experiencing how God works through gay and non-celibate Friends who are called to lead. We need to heal our FUM community so that it better comes to truth using every Friend's contribution. Our energy- including our money- should be spent in ways that move toward such healing.

Though some Friends wish to withhold money as an act of conscience, and some wonder if FUM programs would need to be reduced if we withhold our money, I think that spending the money on inter-visitation would promote healing, and might simply be a better use of our money than whatever FUM would use it for at this time. Perhaps BYM could further explore how withholding our money may or may not reduce FUM's work."

We hope these ideas will support you in dealing with this important issue, and we will continue to hold you in the Light of God's Love.

In Equality,

Jolee Robinson, Clerk, Ministry and Worship Committee


 

Interchange, September 2004

After an especially moving and covered Meeting for Worship, Adelphi undertook a Ministry of Reconciliation in the wake of the prison abuses in Iraq. After a number of meetings, a letter of apology (or minute) was written to the people of Iraq. This letter was circulated to other Friends Meetings, and supported by about 30 additional Meetings. Contributions of over $5000 were received or pledged to publish the letter. The letter appeared in Al Hayat, an international Arabic newspaper, on July 15, 2004.


Plans for a memorial garden on our grounds are continuing to move forward. In support of this, Pastoral Care Committee is planning a series of second hours on death and dying starting in the fall. The series is called “Are you Planning to Die?”


One of our members, Harold Confer, through his organization Ufufuo!, just wrapped up an August work camp in Nairobi. Their task was to assist in reconstructing the Pentecostal Evangelistic Christian Church.


Friends Community School, the school under the care of our Meeting, is gearing up to begin a major campaign to raise funds for the building of the new school in Greenbelt.


Both the Pastoral Care and the Ministry & Worship Committees are considering the appropriate use of e-mail for the discussion of important issues. There have been instances where the use of e-mail resulted in hurt or angry feelings that might have been avoided had the discussion taken place sitting together, waiting for discernment of God’s will. Pastoral Care has recommended that e-mail be used for information purposes only.


Marriage/Ceremonies of Commitment: Wendy Jane Oliver and Bruce Bertschmann, April 3, 2004.
Death: Alice Anderson 8/13/04.



 

Interchange, March 2004

Adelphi continues to be a busy, vibrant community with many visitors and folks new to Quakerism checking us out. We hosted Safe Haven, a traveling shelter for homeless men, the week after Christmas. Although it was a smaller than usual group of men, the Adelphi community participated enthusiastically in preparing dinners and visiting with the men while they stayed in our Meeting House.

Our school, Friends Community School, and the Meeting have been working on building a closer relationship by having events that include both groups. A multigenerational storytelling evening is planned as well as an area dinner. FCS is busy making plans for the construction of their new school building in Greenbelt. A preliminary site plan has been approved by Prince Georges County. In addition, students from the school have been planting trees native to this geographic area on the property as part of first steps to restore the land.

Adelphi has made the decision to lay down its Wednesday evening Meeting for Worship due to extremely low attendance. However, our 9:00 a.m. Sunday Meeting for Worship remains an alternative for those who prefer small Meetings. Some members and attenders attend both the 9:00 a.m. Meeting for Worship and the much larger 10:00 a.m. Meeting in the same morning because the experiences are so different!

Takoma Park Preparatory Meeting has made an important decision to move their Sunday 10:30 a.m. Meeting for Worship to "Sangha" at 7014 Westmoreland Ave. They were meeting on the 3rd floor of a building with no elevator, and this new space has wheelchair access.

Marriage: Somers Knight & Phillip Payett, 12/20/2003.



SPIRITUAL STATE OF THE MEETING REPORT - 2003

Adelphi Friends Meeting is a vital, active Quaker community with nearly 125 children and adult First Day worshippers. The members and attenders of Adelphi Meeting personify many different spiritual journeys, but all unite in the creation and sustaining of a caring community grounded in love, and a common commitment to Quaker testimonies and practices. The entire Meeting community is called upon, with same sense of urgency, to find a variety of ways to satisfy the desire of those relatively new to Quakerism to become grounded in Quaker faith and practice. This grounding is the prerequisite to the quality of our worship, the practice of our faith, the effective sharing of our many spiritual gifts, and the unity of our faith community. Many strongly feel that our meetings for worship would be greatly enriched by a community-wide commitment to the Quaker tradition of expectant waiting for divine guidance, from a better knowledge of Quaker practice, and more reflection from everyone as to whether their messages are Spirit-led.

In 2003, our community was especially challenged to discern and act upon God's will in light of war, terrorism, persistent violent conflict, injustice and a changing global economy. Many of us have struggled to decide where best to invest our time and resources, and to find a balance between works and faith. The Meeting for Worship can provide a well of strength so that we go back into the world and let our lives speak.

For many in our community, Adelphi is their first Quaker experience. The Meeting is blessed with many newcomers and many families with young children. We have a variety of opportunities for worship. A small but committed group participates in mostly silent worship at our 9:00 a.m. Meeting on most First Days. Following this early gathering, people join together in a short period of joyful song in preparation for our large 10:00 a.m. Meeting for Worship. On the third First Days of each month we set aside our 9:00 a.m. Meeting to leave way open for an opportunity of protracted singing. During the last period of Meeting for Worship, we share joys and concerns. There is concern about how to make this sharing period a continuation of the worship experience. The mid-week evening Meeting continued during the year, but dwindling attendance led to a proposal to lay it down. Junior Meeting for the children K through 6th grade and Young Friends Meeting for grades 7 through 12, held on fourth First Day, provide a learning experience in Quaker faith and practice for our young people.

Committees continue to provide opportunities to grow in our faith community through education, service, care and fellowship. Long term planning has been a concern of the Meeting, and we are struggling to determine which committee or committees should have responsibility for it.

As well as spiritual resources, we have community traditions. The annual Strawberry Festival - an intergenerational enterprise generating both fun and revenue - retained its traditional place as our biggest community-building event. This year, it proceeded joyfully and successfully despite a major rainstorm.

Adelphi Meeting nurtures children and youth, in the Meeting community, in the Friends Community School (FCS), and through a tutoring program in the neighborhood Mother Jones Elementary School. First Day School continues to bring religious education and care to our many teens, children, toddlers and infants, thanks to the committed and dedicated efforts of our many adult volunteers, who in turn are nurtured by the joyful Light within all of our children. We encourage participation in BYM camping and other programs, and our youth greatly benefit from them.

Adelphi Meeting also nurtures its adults, through the caring wisdom of pastoral care, clearness committees, adult religious education, second hours, hospitality after Meeting, monthly potlucks; and an abundance of less formal support. The new Fellowship and Outreach Committee greets people as they enter Meeting for Worship, welcomes attenders and visitors, and offers information about our Meeting and about Quakerism. Our men's and women's groups continue to be a source of deep, committed nurture and support to their participants.

Not everyone understands that Meeting for Worship for the Conduct of Business is an expression of commitment to the life of the Meeting and an opportunity to participate in a vital and challenging form of worship. Attendance at these meetings is not as large as we would like. Perhaps we have yet to fully grasp some important lessons in tenderness and reliance on spirit-guided discernment. We continue to season a number of proposals and issues, such as the meaning of membership, the memorial garden, finances and stewardship, air conditioning for the Meeting House, and our relationship with Friends Community School as it purchases property in Greenbelt.

The Takoma Park Meeting continues under our care as a Preparative Meeting, and prepares its own Spiritual State of the Meeting report. Adelphi needs to seek clarity about our role in relation to the Preparative Meeting, and concern has been expressed that there should be more meaningful interaction with Takoma Park.

Adelphi Meeting also enjoys a special relationship with Friends Community School, an elementary school that the Meeting founded 18 years ago. While the FCS community now operates legally separately from the Adelphi Meeting community, with its own Board of Directors, it continues under the spiritual care of the Meeting and all members of Adelphi Friends Meeting are members of the FCS corporation. We support and inspire each other in numerous ways. Many of our children attend FCS, and many new worshippers find their way to us through FCS. There exists some tension between the school and the Meeting, and some pain within the Meeting community concerning the school. As a Meeting, Adelphi continues to seek God's will for how we might best deepen and broaden our spiritual support of this vibrant example of Quaker values.

Adelphi Meeting looks ahead to a year of intentionally deeper grounding in our Quaker traditions, testimonies and practices, and to an ever more Spirit-centered worship experience.

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Upcoming Events 2009


Jan 4
Monthly Pot-Luck and Dialogue
Helena Cobban, "Re-engage!"
William Penn House, DC
Jan 6
Praying with the Mystics
Thomas Hand, SJ - a Jesuit missionary and Zen master
A Shalem Institute Program
Jan 9-11
Radical Spirituality – Radical Simplicity
with Jim Merkel
Pendle Hill program
Jan 16-18
Recording: Spiritual Discipline and Communal Gift
with Mario Cavallini and Sondra Ball
Pendle Hill program
Jan 16-18
Qi Gong: Powerful, Simple Self-Care
with Kevin D. Greene
Pendle Hill program
Jan 23-25
2009 Women's Retreat
4-H Center, Front Royal, VA
Contact: Helen Tasker;
Betsy Tobin
Jan 23-25
Compassionate Communication
with Jane Connor and Pamela Freeman
Pendle Hill program
Jan 25-29
Prayer: No Strings Attached
with Chris Ravndal
Pendle Hill program
Jan 26
Deadline for Interchange Articles. Send articles to admin@bym-rsf.org
Jan 30-Feb 1
On Being Gathered
with Deborah Haines
Pendle Hill program
Jan 31
US Quakers in the 2lst Century:
Human Security vs National Security
with Helena Cobban
Bethesda Peace Workshop
Jan 31
Care for the Care Giver
Bon Secours Spiritual Center
Feb 3
Praying with the Mystics
Thomas Merton - a Trappist monk
A Shalem Institute Program
Feb 8
Monthly Pot-Luck and Dialogue
Pat Schenck, Elizabeth DuVerlie
"Being White in a Multicultural Society"
William Penn House, DC
Feb 20
Workshop Proposals Due!
for 2009 Annual Sessions; Peg Hansen
Feb 20-22
Washington Friends Conference on Religion and Psychology
"Energy Psychology and Spiritual Well-being"
Mar 3
Praying with the Mystics
Bridgit, Patrick & Columba
A Shalem Institute Program
Mar 6-8
Weaving Sacred Wholeness
An intergenerational conference on diversity
Friends General Conference
Mar 21
BYM Interim Meeting
Sandy Spring Meeting
Elizabeth Meyer
Mar 22
Contemplation:
A Loving Presence To What Is
Bon Secours Spiritual Center


More Events in 2009



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